The hellos to all those who've been wondering where the nag's gone. She was finally busy attending college!! It feels so good to be back to the old routine of having something other than another day at home to look forward to after 3 months spent that way.
Anyway, as I write this, I'm not in such a great mood after all. Reason being only one totally uncomplicated one: Love-aria!
It doesn't matter confessing to it here, considering the guy concerned knows himself now, but I do wish everything were different right now. We're back to being friends and all laughing around and all, but there come these pangs of missing him. In every sense of the term. When I miss a person, I get very restless, and cranky. Here, I'm missing him being actually, physically present, talking rubbish, making me laugh with his queer wisecracks, having that pensive look for a fraction of a second. That's the usual stuff. Then I realised what else I missed about him.
It's very primitive, but I have a thing with smells, just the way I have a thing with numbers: I identify smells to places, incidents and people. They don't have to be a particular smell, like how can one describe a smell anyway? It's the ideas that come along, you relate stories and memories to smells. It's the feeling it gives you.
I wouldn't know what he smells of, but the scent reminds me of mangoes, and rain. And new notebooks, new shoes. It's a combination of all my favourite smells. It's a smell that reminds me of sitting late on the benches talking about people and schools. Carrom powder to an extent. It reminds me of knees touching, playing footsie when no one can notice, kicking each other and the expression on everyone else's face when where everything is normal and quiet, we suddenly start laughing because of something only both of us find funny.
He smells of a guy grown up, and ready to do what it takes to wipe the person he likes off her feet. The idea of which gives me butterflies the size of dinosaurs in my stomach.
And that's it. I wonder how long it will take me to get out of this, but I'll take my time anyway. Adios.
wats with gals and pink? :O
ReplyDeletehad a break up? [:(]
keep urself busy gal..ull move on i guess.or who knows mebbe things will get better..
all d best to u
btw changed my blog url..its www.scriptedinsanity.blogspot.com
cheers
Chris
I wait for the day when someone would act my instincts up the way yours are.
ReplyDeleteI think the smell thing is because of phemerones
ReplyDelete@ C R D
ReplyDeleteRead again, not a break up. Come to think of it, there wasn't anything there anyway. Thanks for the advice and the wishes, I'll move on. And yes, I did update your URL.
Sankoobaba
I'm not sure I know what phemerones are, I'll look it up. Thanks anyway.
The way you've described your longing for your friend: Getting restless, Having pangs, Remembering smells, gave me the idea of how strongly your mind (and hence your body) feels about this person.
ReplyDeleteI go through a lot of emotional cycles too, and I let my instincts rule me. When I hear a good piece of music, they elevate me to brilliant states of existence. When I feel my instincts acted up this way, I feel truly alive. Sadly, it lasts only for a few moments.
I wish I would meet someone who could make my instincts go as wild, who could make my mind and my body react as wildly. Who could make me feel alive.
hey, reading ur blogs make me realise how awesome it is to express your thoughts ideas feelings..and its kinda fun too cos u actually figure out what you really are!:)
ReplyDelete