The migrating Man-Boy.

And for the second time in a month, a support system leaves home-soil. 

My mother once boasted to someone about what a strong friends circle I have, and I think she's absolutely right. Each element in that circle was agonisingly helpful, attached and a perfect friend with a role to play. 

So what do you do when you're in a stretch of 4 days when 4 of these friends take off to another country, for a very very long time?

I decided not to sit and cry. But day 1, and I'm already feeling the strain as Karan Dhebar sits at the airport.

My pillar, my subject, the predictor of moods and the controller of emotions has just left tonight for a new life in London. He made me realise that it's okay to wear my heart on my sleeve, that love doesn't ask to happen, and nothing is certain.

He's taught me lessons in how to look beyond appearances into truths about people and how ruthlessness is often a result of ignorance. He's broken my heart when he got his heart shattered and he's made me a stronger person by letting me take care of him when he needed me to. We're not finished yet, but with the distance grown so much I'm more worried about what he'll be like than the 'missing' tirade. 

He's on the airport right now and I'm feeling worse than ever for not being there to say bye. I'm feeling terrible for not clicking pictures of his last few moments in Mumbai for a long time, that might stretch into years. I'm trying to prepare myself for nights that begin with a few minutes of wondering how he is and then hoping that someone there sees the anguished, non-flamboyant side that this man-boy dons. 

So again, unsolicited advice to the bro of all bros (and me, who isn't a bro per se). 

Keep safe.

Remember that we're all back home and we love you.

Keep the phone charged, because when someone hits the panic button and decides to call you, it'll cause less damage when you answer.

We love you a lot, okay? Bas phone kar lena.

Give a lot of yourself to everyone there, that's who you are- selfless, undiscriminating, loving, the emperor of gossip-mongers, the homie- all those senseless words. But we know Karu/KD/Dhebar/Debbie etc- and we know you'll change. Just don't forget us in the bargain.

Don't get your heart broken again. I'll want to come there and you know that could do your cool repo a lot of damage. 

Keep dreaming.

Stay beautiful.

And you're the sweetest guy ever. And I/we/everyone here really loves you. (Special jhappi from Babboo and me, separate and team huddle and everything)

Dear Manchester,

Take care of Karan Dhebar, he's excited and he's got a weird accent, but he's a good boy. Lucky you.

Sincerely, 

overtly-emotional-best-friend-who-didn't-even-say-goodbye

And this, is his birthday poem. Two years back. 

Thirty seconds into anger

And I lose myself again

There starts the need of a leash

And something to kill the strain

On a day when the sun’s too harsh

And tears begin to flow

You’re a friend when I need you most

And this I need you to know- 

You’re my unexpected guardian

And you can make the frowns fly,

And you restore my cool and sense

And I need you to pacify

The passionate outbursts I have

Every second terrible day.

You’ve never let me down

Please don’t ever go away.

There’re times when we both hurt

And no one can even tell

Where the wounds appeared

Or the path where we fell.

But this to you I promise

That even if I don’t see you fall

I’ll be right by your side pronto

Away by just a call.

A beginning we never saw

An end that’ll never come-

I’ll never let go of the ideal friend

You have become.

All your funny antics aside

And behind that wall of cheer-

Just let me know what’s hurting

And I’ll make the pain disappear.

I’m feeling blessed today

That I have you around me

For joy and through pain

Through broken hearts and scraped knee-

We’ll run through like oddments we’ll always be-

KD, not just on your birthday- I hope you’re always happy!